Stories about children’s days
Rama, 17 year old girl
About Rama’s life
Rama and her family moved to Kathmandu when she was two years old. She lives, with her sick mother, in a temporary shelter built out of concrete blocks, and with a tin roof. Rama’s family is very poor. Her father left the family when she was a small child. Rama’s mother has worked hard to provide for her and her elder sister, but now her mother’s poor health means that she cannot work. Rama is head of the family now.
Rama runs a beauty parlour that is adjoined to her home. Rama opened the beauty parlour with support from a local NGO. Her monthly income fluctuates depending on the number of customers, so she also works in a dance bar as a dancer, where she earns NPR 20,000 (US $180) a month. When the beauty parlour is doing well, Rama can earn NPR 30,000 (US $280) but it can be more like NPR 25,000 (US $220).
Rama at work in her beauty parlour during the day
People think I wake up very late but what they don’t understand is, I work the whole night and sometimes go to bed at four in the morning.
Rama’s mother is bedridden most of the time
Rama is the main provider for her family, so she spends her earnings on the family’s basic needs and on medicine for her mother.
Rama works 14 hours a day. She works in her parlour for six hours and then at the dance bar for eight hours. She is tired at the end of the day. Rama doesn’t like to work in a way that leaves her no personal time. However, she feels she doesn’t have any other choice. Rama stopped her education at a young age. For a time, she had been trying to combine working and going to school, but she ended up skipping many classes and failing her exams. Rama then discontinued her education and began working full time.
“I don’t like the fact that drinking is considered natural here and is expected of us.”
Rama at work at the dance bar at night
Dancer and other worker
Rama recorded her experiences at home and work on 27th of February 2023. It was a fairly typical day for her.
Rama in her workplace
Rama doesn’t like her work at the dance bar. She is very new to this field of work. Her manager is strict and doesn’t allow her to take sick leave, making her work even when she is ill. Rama also feels harassed when customers force her to dance when she doesn’t feel like it and when colleagues coerce her to drink and smoke. Rama would prefer it if her parlour was earning her good money, then she would never have to work in a dance bar.
Girl dancing in a dance bar
Rama’s day
Rama’s experience
I wake up around 10:00 am. I prepare food myself and for my mother, this takes me around 45 minutes.
Researcher’s experience
Rama’s home is a makeshift shelter and is very basic. It contains a small kitchen and a bedroom. Rama’s mother is in bed as she is ill. The lifestyle that Rama portrays with her clothing and appearance and the reality of her life are completely different. We didn’t realise she was living such a hard life until we saw her home.
Dancing with high heels
Rama’s experience
I open the beauty parlour around 11am. It is adjoined to our home, so I don’t have to rush, and have had ample time to cook food and freshen up.
Although I cooked early on, I eat for the first time around 1 pm, at my parlour, as I don’t feel like eating earlier. Sometimes I eat my first meal as late as 3pm, this is when there are many customers. I really like my work at beauty parlour as I believe I am skilled at this work. However, I don’t believe the parlour will give me a better life. I am planning on going abroad.
I have a few customers throughout the day, but business isn’t very good. The day proceeds as usual I don’t have much to do other than be on social media and talk to my mother. Before I leave for the dance bar, I do my makeup at the parlour, and this takes me around 15 minutes.
Researcher’s experience
Rama is in her parlour putting makeup on a customer. She asks us to sit and wait until she finishes her work.
Rama is on her period, and we can see that she is in pain from her face and the way that she walks. Still, she has to go to the dance bar, wearing a fake smile and a face full of makeup.
A neighbourhood street near the dance bar
Rama’s experience
After closing the parlour, I head straight for the dance bar.
It is quite a distance from my home and the beauty parlour. If I walk, it takes almost two hours, so I use Pathao (a ride sharing app) to get there. It usually takes between 30 and 40 minutes but today it takes about an hour because of bad traffic.
Researcher’s experience
Rama leaves for work around 6 pm. It is a cloudy and cold day. She gets to work by a Pathao ride.
Dancer
Rama’s experience
I reach the dance bar around 7pm. Today, I am quite nervous because I am a bit late. Some customers have already arrived, and various responsibilities have been assigned to my colleagues.
I put on my dancing dress and get to work straight away. I am on my period today and due to heavy bleeding, I can’t perform and dance well. I have back pain too. The owner won’t give me a day off, which makes me feel very bad.
The environment here is suffocating for me. I really don’t like the smell of smoke but many of the customers’ smoke hookah and cigarettes. Most of them drink alcohol. Lots of my colleagues’ smoke and drink with the customers and it makes me feel quite uncomfortable.
I am annoyed when a customer offers me a drink and a cigarette. Some of them ask me if I will go out with them. Some of the drunker guests are more forceful in their approach. Once one guy held my hand and pulled me. I really don’t like such behaviour, but I feel helpless as I don’t have anyone to support me.
Researcher’s experience
We arrive at Rama’s workplace around 7pm. The buildings are well lit and there is a lot going on around the outside of the venue. There are other such venues nearby and all of them are open. Customers of all ages – old and young, including teenage boys, and even girls are pouring into the dance bar.
Rama struggles to be the odd one out by not participating in smoking and drinking alcohol. She dislikes the normalising of sex work within the venue. She explains how difficult she finds the smoke, the bad smells and the loud environment.
Rama’s experience
Most of my colleagues at the dance bar negotiate with the customers to go and spend the night with them after the dance bar closes, and this is expected of me too.
I leave work at 12:30am. The route I take home is the same. The owner provides me with a ride so the journey is safe for me. I reach home around 1 am.
Rama’s experience
I freshen up and change my clothes, then as I am very tired after a long day of work, I go to bed.
Explore Rama’s journey
Supriya, 16, works in a party palace (party venue) from 5pm until midnight.
Pema, 15, works in events catering in the afternoons and evenings, after going to college in the morning.
Khem, 17, has worked for a relative in a khaja ghar (small eatery) since he was ten years old.
Arpita, 16, works in a massage and spa venue.